The visual swish is another popular technique used in NLP. It also involves the use of the mental screen. It is used to change your feelings about something you don’t like.
You start by looking at the imaginary movie screen and seeing yourself just like it’s somebody else. See yourself doing something you don’t like and feel the feeling you want to get rid of.
Now imagine something you like and feel the way you want to feel.
Start with the old image big and bright and a new image as a small dark square in the corner of the old one.
Perform the swish—quickly expand and brighten the new image while simultaneously shrinking and darkening the old image. Do it quickly. Perform several times.
Another variant of the swish pattern is to imagine someone you don’t like (your boss, for example). Watch them for a little while. Now imagine them wearing a clown suit. Add little horns and moustache. Instead of hearing them speaking imagine that they speak in a squeaky voice that makes people laugh. Make the image silly and you’ll notice that you can’t help smiling. Repeat as needed.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Friday, March 6, 2009
NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming)
This is a fairly new field that has vast possibilities in social interaction. The idea is that our brain functions like a biological computer and our beliefs are programmed in the very early childhood. Some traumatic event long forgotten might have more impact on your life than your conscious realization of your strengths and weaknesses.
It does not mean, however, that we can’t use our conscious mind to change our behavior. In fact, that is what NLP is all about. Here is the basic procedure of a new behavior generator to give you an idea. Feel free to adjust it to any situation.
Suppose you suffer from shyness and would like to develop more self-confidence. Think of someone who, in your opinion, has ultimate (or at least to a degree you want) self confidence. Think James Bond, for example or Arnold Schwarzenegger or it can be your uncle. It does not matter who as long as that person possesses the quality you want to develop.
Now imagine the situation where that person uses that quality. Your might think of it as watching a mental movie. Imagine the situation in vivid detail, as clear as possible.
Now is the crucial step. While you are watching this mental picture, change James Bond (or whoever you imagine) into yourself. Continue to experience the scene in all the colourful details.
Now change the focus from the third person to the first person perspective. Now it is you who is dealing so marvelously with the situation. It is actually you who possesses the superb self-confidence (or whatever quality you want to develop).
This technique is known as creative visualization. You visualize situation and yourself in it the way you want it to happen. If done frequently enough and with enough intensity and feeling, you should notice results quickly, like within 3-4 weeks. Don’t give up if you don’t succeed on the first try, approach to it as a game, with relaxed frame of mind. You have nothing to lose but a lot to gain.
It does not mean, however, that we can’t use our conscious mind to change our behavior. In fact, that is what NLP is all about. Here is the basic procedure of a new behavior generator to give you an idea. Feel free to adjust it to any situation.
Suppose you suffer from shyness and would like to develop more self-confidence. Think of someone who, in your opinion, has ultimate (or at least to a degree you want) self confidence. Think James Bond, for example or Arnold Schwarzenegger or it can be your uncle. It does not matter who as long as that person possesses the quality you want to develop.
Now imagine the situation where that person uses that quality. Your might think of it as watching a mental movie. Imagine the situation in vivid detail, as clear as possible.
Now is the crucial step. While you are watching this mental picture, change James Bond (or whoever you imagine) into yourself. Continue to experience the scene in all the colourful details.
Now change the focus from the third person to the first person perspective. Now it is you who is dealing so marvelously with the situation. It is actually you who possesses the superb self-confidence (or whatever quality you want to develop).
This technique is known as creative visualization. You visualize situation and yourself in it the way you want it to happen. If done frequently enough and with enough intensity and feeling, you should notice results quickly, like within 3-4 weeks. Don’t give up if you don’t succeed on the first try, approach to it as a game, with relaxed frame of mind. You have nothing to lose but a lot to gain.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
A Few Words About Rapport
Rapport is much misunderstood in conversational hypnosis. It is usually described as a mutual feeling of liking between two persons. While it can be so, rapport is more than that.
Rapport is not necessarily liking. Rather it is a feeling of connection and trust. Think of a combat situation in martial arts, for instance. The opponents are not always friends. Great combats are usually held between the rivals: people of equal skills who are earnestly engaged in the combat. They would feel that wonderful sense of connection that is beyond liking, love or hate.
Rapport is experienced on verbal and non-verbal levels. Have you ever met someone to whom you instantly took a great sympathy? Lots of people tell stories when they met someone to whom they instantly took a sudden repulsion without knowing why. These are examples of rapport on a non-verbal level.
Rapport on a verbal or linguistic level is created by words. Thoughts have structure that are linked to feeling. By using proper words we can create a certain feeling thus establishing rapport.
Any language structure that mirrors people’s thought bypass their critical factor. That is why part of the mirroring techniques is to imitate people’s rate of speech and use similar speech patterns. They would also be using certain words that you can pick up and use in your conversation with them. Also at the gatherings, if a situation allows, speak of the subjects that are interesting to them. It also helps to establish rapport; sharing of interest. If you don’t know much of the subject, ask questions that you’d like to know the answer to. But don’t fake the interest, it is a fatal mistake. Most people would feel that your interest is not genuine.
How do you establish rapport on non-verbal level? This is actually more difficult as people judge each other on the unconscious level. But the same principle of mirroring technique apply here; imitate but don’t mimic. Make your motions fluid and natural. For example you can assume the same posture and use gestures in a similar way. The key here is to be subtle and not to mimic them directly. If they scratch their nose, for example, wait a few seconds and touch your chin. Above all, be natural. On the other hand, don’t be afraid, people don’t know what you are up to and what seems very obvious to you is virtually undetectable for them.
Rapport is one of the key ingredients in conversational hypnosis. It is much easier to influence people with whom you establish a sense of connection. It is still possible to influence people without rapport but it takes more advanced level of skill. Learn to establish rapport and you will have an easy time with conversational hypnosis.
Rapport skills also work cross-culturally. It is possible to live in another country without speaking the language and have a great time there because people in general like you.
Rapport is not necessarily liking. Rather it is a feeling of connection and trust. Think of a combat situation in martial arts, for instance. The opponents are not always friends. Great combats are usually held between the rivals: people of equal skills who are earnestly engaged in the combat. They would feel that wonderful sense of connection that is beyond liking, love or hate.
Rapport is experienced on verbal and non-verbal levels. Have you ever met someone to whom you instantly took a great sympathy? Lots of people tell stories when they met someone to whom they instantly took a sudden repulsion without knowing why. These are examples of rapport on a non-verbal level.
Rapport on a verbal or linguistic level is created by words. Thoughts have structure that are linked to feeling. By using proper words we can create a certain feeling thus establishing rapport.
Any language structure that mirrors people’s thought bypass their critical factor. That is why part of the mirroring techniques is to imitate people’s rate of speech and use similar speech patterns. They would also be using certain words that you can pick up and use in your conversation with them. Also at the gatherings, if a situation allows, speak of the subjects that are interesting to them. It also helps to establish rapport; sharing of interest. If you don’t know much of the subject, ask questions that you’d like to know the answer to. But don’t fake the interest, it is a fatal mistake. Most people would feel that your interest is not genuine.
How do you establish rapport on non-verbal level? This is actually more difficult as people judge each other on the unconscious level. But the same principle of mirroring technique apply here; imitate but don’t mimic. Make your motions fluid and natural. For example you can assume the same posture and use gestures in a similar way. The key here is to be subtle and not to mimic them directly. If they scratch their nose, for example, wait a few seconds and touch your chin. Above all, be natural. On the other hand, don’t be afraid, people don’t know what you are up to and what seems very obvious to you is virtually undetectable for them.
Rapport is one of the key ingredients in conversational hypnosis. It is much easier to influence people with whom you establish a sense of connection. It is still possible to influence people without rapport but it takes more advanced level of skill. Learn to establish rapport and you will have an easy time with conversational hypnosis.
Rapport skills also work cross-culturally. It is possible to live in another country without speaking the language and have a great time there because people in general like you.
Monday, December 22, 2008
4 Words of Power
4 words of power are the essential part of conversational hypnosis that deals with hypnotic language pattern or the use of words. These 4 words are tools to achieve a certain effect of logic. But before we get to them, lets us look briefly what else one should know before starting using these 4 words of power.
There are 2 master keys or main principles when it comes in using words for conversational hypnosis.
1. The principle of flow. When you use these words, use them smoothly, do not make unusual pauses in conversation. In fact, the smoother you can be, the better is the effect. All good conversationalists are smooth talkers.
2. The principle of association. When we use words, we invariably tend to think of other words or rather objects and concepts associated with them. These are usually different for everyone but there are lots of generic ones as well. For example, a ninety-year old man is associated with old man, gray-haired man, old age, etc.
The 4 words of power are: as, because, and, means (and their equivalents). As you can see, these words are neutral in themselves but they allow us to create linguistic bridges that link one idea to another. And get this: these ideas do not have to have anything in common or be normally associated with each other. Use of these words, however, let us lead a person we are trying to influence through one idea to another and through several other ideas in-between. The created effect of seeming logic is what makes these words so powerful.
The word because is especially powerful as it provides the reason for doing things. You have probably heard of a famous example. Harvard social psychologist Ellen Langer made an experiment. She asked in the line for a copy machine to go first. The first time she asked: “Excuse me, I have 5 pages. May I go first, because I am in a hurry?” The rate of compliance was nearly total: 94% let her skip ahead. When she just asked: “Excuse me, I have 5 pages. May I go first?” only 60% complied. At first glance it appears that the difference between these two requests was the reason provided by the word because. But the third request was formulated like this: “Excuse me, I have 5 pages. May I go first because I need to make some copies?” What do you think the rate of compliance was? Nearly the same as in the first case: 93%. That’s when it became clear that people reacted to the word because and let the real reason just slip by. The word because implies reason, so a person’s brain is less likely to question the validity of that reason, whatever it might be.
The above example is taken from the book by Robert Cialdini Influence. New York. Morrow. 1984. p. 18.
There are 2 master keys or main principles when it comes in using words for conversational hypnosis.
1. The principle of flow. When you use these words, use them smoothly, do not make unusual pauses in conversation. In fact, the smoother you can be, the better is the effect. All good conversationalists are smooth talkers.
2. The principle of association. When we use words, we invariably tend to think of other words or rather objects and concepts associated with them. These are usually different for everyone but there are lots of generic ones as well. For example, a ninety-year old man is associated with old man, gray-haired man, old age, etc.
The 4 words of power are: as, because, and, means (and their equivalents). As you can see, these words are neutral in themselves but they allow us to create linguistic bridges that link one idea to another. And get this: these ideas do not have to have anything in common or be normally associated with each other. Use of these words, however, let us lead a person we are trying to influence through one idea to another and through several other ideas in-between. The created effect of seeming logic is what makes these words so powerful.
The word because is especially powerful as it provides the reason for doing things. You have probably heard of a famous example. Harvard social psychologist Ellen Langer made an experiment. She asked in the line for a copy machine to go first. The first time she asked: “Excuse me, I have 5 pages. May I go first, because I am in a hurry?” The rate of compliance was nearly total: 94% let her skip ahead. When she just asked: “Excuse me, I have 5 pages. May I go first?” only 60% complied. At first glance it appears that the difference between these two requests was the reason provided by the word because. But the third request was formulated like this: “Excuse me, I have 5 pages. May I go first because I need to make some copies?” What do you think the rate of compliance was? Nearly the same as in the first case: 93%. That’s when it became clear that people reacted to the word because and let the real reason just slip by. The word because implies reason, so a person’s brain is less likely to question the validity of that reason, whatever it might be.
The above example is taken from the book by Robert Cialdini Influence. New York. Morrow. 1984. p. 18.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
The Power of Conversational Hypnosis Review
A while ago I found out about a great hypnosis course that seems to include pretty much everything on conversational hypnosis. It is designed by the world-class hypnotist Igor Ledochowski and promoted by Clifford Mee. I have not heard about Igor before that but he seems to know his stuff. The style of hypnosis he teaches is based on the work of legendary Milton Erickson who was the greatest hypnotist the world has known so far.
The program covers pretty much everything to start you on the way to use conversational hypnosis consciously. From building rapport to hypnotic language patterns. It is fascinating to learn and it will prove useful in many situations.
A word of warning. Hypnosis in general and this course in particular is not a magic button that you push and people start automatically doing you bidding. Unfortunately the sales copy is overhyped in this respect though nearly not as much as the other ones on the market. Rather it is a set of tools, different approaches and techniques that will help you to improve your communication skills. Like any other skill it has to be learnt and especially practiced. But this one delivers and for the amount of material presented (14 hour CDs) it seems to be a fair price.
You can read all the features on the sales page so I won't repeat them here. Be sure to check out their free copy, it is exceptionally good and will give you a fair understanding of the main principles of hypnosis and also the taste of what the main course is like. I have never had a better free offer than at this course, usually "free gift" is totally meaningless junk trying to sell you the main product. This one is good.
So if you feel like it's time for you to improve your arsenal of communication or social skill this product might be very helpful. It also comes with 2 months guarantee.
link removed
To your success!
The program covers pretty much everything to start you on the way to use conversational hypnosis consciously. From building rapport to hypnotic language patterns. It is fascinating to learn and it will prove useful in many situations.
A word of warning. Hypnosis in general and this course in particular is not a magic button that you push and people start automatically doing you bidding. Unfortunately the sales copy is overhyped in this respect though nearly not as much as the other ones on the market. Rather it is a set of tools, different approaches and techniques that will help you to improve your communication skills. Like any other skill it has to be learnt and especially practiced. But this one delivers and for the amount of material presented (14 hour CDs) it seems to be a fair price.
You can read all the features on the sales page so I won't repeat them here. Be sure to check out their free copy, it is exceptionally good and will give you a fair understanding of the main principles of hypnosis and also the taste of what the main course is like. I have never had a better free offer than at this course, usually "free gift" is totally meaningless junk trying to sell you the main product. This one is good.
So if you feel like it's time for you to improve your arsenal of communication or social skill this product might be very helpful. It also comes with 2 months guarantee.
link removed
To your success!
Friday, October 24, 2008
Welcome to Conversational Hypnosis!
Dear Reader,
What do you think about when you hear the word "hypnosis"? Do you immediately visualize a man dressed in black cape swinging his watch, looking into his subjects' eye and commanding "You are feeling sleepy!" or does the word remind you of those "stop smoking with hypnosis" slogans? Maybe you associate hypnosis with sleep or near sleep state when you have to obey commands of a hypnotist without will?
Well, hypnosis is all of the above and none of the above. It can certainly be used for all of the mentioned scenarios but the theory and concept behind hypnosis is deeper than that.
Hypnosis is a state of consciousness when the conscious mind is "switched off", so to speak. It creates the state of heightened suggestibility that can be used to slide in the hypnotic suggestion. Another comparison that I like is your subconsciousness is like a dark cave full of mysterious things that we can only guess about. The conscious mind is like a dutiful guard watching what gets into this cave and what does not. Hypnosis is a way to put this guard to sleep or at least temporarily distract his attention.
Hypnosis has always fascinated humankind. From the ancient records we read stories about wizard, witches that remind us of present day hypnotists. For that matter every manipulation of human awareness can be called hypnosis.
What do you think about when you hear the word "hypnosis"? Do you immediately visualize a man dressed in black cape swinging his watch, looking into his subjects' eye and commanding "You are feeling sleepy!" or does the word remind you of those "stop smoking with hypnosis" slogans? Maybe you associate hypnosis with sleep or near sleep state when you have to obey commands of a hypnotist without will?
Well, hypnosis is all of the above and none of the above. It can certainly be used for all of the mentioned scenarios but the theory and concept behind hypnosis is deeper than that.
Hypnosis is a state of consciousness when the conscious mind is "switched off", so to speak. It creates the state of heightened suggestibility that can be used to slide in the hypnotic suggestion. Another comparison that I like is your subconsciousness is like a dark cave full of mysterious things that we can only guess about. The conscious mind is like a dutiful guard watching what gets into this cave and what does not. Hypnosis is a way to put this guard to sleep or at least temporarily distract his attention.
Hypnosis has always fascinated humankind. From the ancient records we read stories about wizard, witches that remind us of present day hypnotists. For that matter every manipulation of human awareness can be called hypnosis.
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